Ladies and gentlemen, the only suit worthy of starting off a series of posts dedicated to awful, stupid, ugly, and impractical mobile suit designs:

The Juaggu.

Are we being serious right now? Let’s break this down Cracked.com style:

On the conceptual level:

This MS was developed from the Acguy, which probably deserves its own post on here simply based on looks. Thing is, that suit’s at least practical; watch 08th MS Team and you can see it pretty handily wreck a Gundam with a combination of every element of its compact arsenal.

So, the geniuses at Zeon took a suit that could actually hang with an early Gundam and developed it into the Juaggu. Now that they’ve effectively ruined its melee capabilities for the seeming purpose of making it able to sit in cute poses, they outdid themselves even further by giving it an elephant trunk. Sure, those three hand-cannons can deal a bit more damage, but it sucks for you if anything more maneuverable (like any old mass-produced Federation suit) gets up close. Judging by the practicality of this suit so far, I’m guessing that task wouldn’t even be that hard.

One plus? This one has a mega particle cannon in the chest, somewhat similar in nature to the one on the Gogg.

But wait, it’s housed right next to—and sometimes under, depending on how the head is turned—the SNOUT. Why any MS needs a SNOUT is beyond me.

“Awww, maybe the Feddies will take pity.”

On the design level:

So it has three cannons on each strange tube of an arm, four particle cannons in the chest, and some Vulcan cannons for good measure. What’s used to stabilize all that recoil?

Looks to me like some import exhaust pipes.

“At least they’re from the UK.”

It’s amazing this thing doesn’t topple when someone gives it a dirty look. Must be the thrusters on the feet and back that keep it stabilized. Except rather than have thrusters on the bottom of the feet, there are some fans.

This just furthers my point that this suit’s legs are actually just some exhaust ports.

To sum it up:

Zeon is the one faction in Gundam that continuously makes mobile suits that leave me questioning the thought processes of the designers (like the Zaku Tank, or the fact they have about 7 amphibious suits to perform the same duties). However, there is none so completely absurd as this Import Elephant Car, and that’s why the Juaggu has the honors of being the first and most WTF of my Gundam WTF Suits of the Day.

I leave you with the only thing this mobile suit should ever be seen doing:

“Remember what I said about melee range?”

Being destroyed.